You know despite what she says, Medusa wins this award every year. And interestingly enough, none of the other nominees ever seem to come to the show. What's up with that? I guess they know when there's no contest. Medusa, Meryl Streep. Oh! Speaking of which, how's Fedelm? Is she ... unpetrified yet? Is she okay? I left her in the infirmary with the mad scientists. She could have three heads by now.

Okay, our next award is one of my favorites, Most Spectacular Loss of Body Parts by a Monster in a Lead Role.

And the nominees are:

• The Headless Horseman in "Polo, Anyone?"
• Humbaba in "Rollin' on Hwawa"
• Talos in "Achilles, My Foot!"
• and The Phoenix for "Great Balls of Fire!"