In a strange twist of fate, you find yourself discovering a heretofore unknown temple of Ereshkigal, Lady and Ruler of the Netherworld.

Ok, so maybe things in the archaeological world aren’t going so well for you. So what if you and your faithless guide, Fakhr, got rip-roaring drunk last night to try and numb the sense of failure. Come to think of it, maybe it was just you. But, at least you managed to stumble upon - and pass out in - an uncharted temple.

You can barely make out the figure of the goddess depicted on the wall before you. There is only a small stream of sunlight filtering through a hole somewhere above your pounding head to illuminate the deadly queen. You feel around and luckily find your handy-dandy, never-leave-home-without-it, travel pack. Inside you find your flashlight and a bottle of aspirin.

After a tussle with the child proof cap, you manage to gulp down a couple of the latter and then switch on the flashlight. Squinting from the sudden, blinding light, you shine it on the cartouche of Ereshkigal. Below the picture of her receiving gifts, you see some ancient cuneiform script. Heart racing, and headache forgotten for the moment, you read the text under your breath:

The traveler descends from the Great Above to the Great Below. The one who comes before Ereshkigal, Queen of the Great Below, comes from the Great Above…

Yaddah, yaddah, yaddah. Man these ancients love to repeat themselves, you think to yourself. You skim over the glorification of Ereshkigal and more text about the Great Above and the Great Below to get to the heart of the piece.

As with the foolish Inanna, the one who came from the Great Above, to the Great Below, Oh Brother! you too must pass through the seven gates. Pass through the seven gates - the seven challenges - of the Great Below, to the domain of Ereshkigal, Queen of the Great Below, to claim the prize of this temple. Choose unwisely in your journey, and you shall forever roam within the domain of Ereshkigal, Queen of the dead, Yaddah, yaddah, yaddah.

The inscription ends without coughing up anymore clues as to how to successfully pass through these seven challenges. You decide it’s time to take a closer look at your surroundings. About ten feet above you, there is a hole in the ceiling. That must have been the way you came to be in this mess. No doubt part of your headache is from the fall. Thankfully the gods watch out for fools and drunks alike. You could have broken some bones, or even your neck from a fall such as that! Unfortunately, you cannot get back up to that hole in order to go back through and into the “Great Above”.

Next, you flash the surrounding walls…No, no! Not like that! With your flashlight! Sheesh!

Surrounding you on the two sides adjacent to the depiction of Ereshkigal are pretty carvings of suffering souls. How cheerful, you think sardonically. Is that dust they’re eating? Eww!

Averting your eyes from the dead, you see that there are three ways out of this chamber. Opposite of the Queen of the Dead, you see three gaping holes staring sightlessly back at you. Upon closer inspection, you see they were once covered by doors that have long since turned to dust.

Above each doorway, you read an inscription. From left to right they read:

You have journeyed from a land far, far away.

You have come from the Great Above.

You have come to feast with the dead. Dust, yum!