the cold breeze of the morning...
freeze my face and toes...
as i tuck it in the warm snug temperature between the sheets..
i relise that this feeling is transcendent...
and soon enough somethign comes to disrupt it...
the urge to go to release yesterdays residue...
the urge is but a prik on the finger...
as you continue to outstand it..
and try to treasue what you have..
the pain slowly increases and you relise that...
you cannot withstand it any longer..
you dont want to get up..
your afraid what you will loose...
but your afraid what you must do...
will be done where you are sleeping so gracefully...
so you quickly hurry to release it all..
and return...to bed.. and its gone...
you can feel the essence...the remains of what once was there..
you feel what you once feel again everyday...
you stupidly try to retain what was once lost..
as you lay there to return this warmth...
as it slowly returns..
what you felt is different..
somewhat...anomalous..
and it soon heats up...
the warmth is too hot..
its irratating..annoying....
and you kick the blankets away...
you cant stand the heat...
and accept that you cant attain it again...
not untill you sleep again..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
in a dark room filled with people...
blinded, looking forward, upwards, backward, sideward....
seeying no further then thier hands...
hearing, screams of children...
smelling the musk of men....
touching the soft silk of women....
as a spot light shuns down in the centre of the room...
a man stands before them...
this man shows why he belongs in this light...
perform incredible strength...
another light appears and a woman appears...
this woman shows why she belongs in this light...
performing magnificiant acrobatic skills...
the crowd eagerly wants to show why they should be under the light...
stumbbling to the centre...there is a glass wall...
an announcement is soon herd...that this is the
circus spectacular...
the room starts to fill up with light...
a big man....high up in the room...
looks down apon them...
at a snap of a whip...animals appear before him...
kneeling, jumping, growling, it goes on and on...
soon enuff clowns come rushing in...
they dont have a light shun apon them...
they are fighting to be within the spotlight...
they are in the background...
crying, laughing.....
one clown tries to perform an acrobatic trick and falls over...
the other clown tries to lift the same amount of weight as the man did...and falls over...
one clown tries to get high up to the tent...to reach to the whip....and falls over...
some of the crowd laughs at their effort...
some of the crowd are amazed at their efforts..
some of the crowd dont even care...
the crowd is astonished and tries its best to crack this glass wall...
some try to climb it..
some try to find a door...
some try to dig deep into the ground...
some give up...and leave the tent...
soon the show ends...
and they once again are within darkness...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
the edge of a cliff...
the wind luring you, pushing you to jump...
you lean as curiosity of the unknown off in to the distance...
a gust of wind, and you loose your balance and fall off the cliff...
as you soon accept your fate...
death embraces you...
a celebration as your hair dances in the air...
maybe you should keep your eyes open...
maybe you should close it...
sigh...again with the maybes...
even when faced with death comes with decisions..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

a flicker of spark lights up my night...
a gouged flame burn the very essense of evil...
as a minion follows and breaths in the intoxic fumes...
left in extasy, as my lungs deterieorate...
having full acknowledgment of the harms and affect it can cause...
i once again breath in, addicted to the fumes...
i closes my eyes and tilts my head back and loses my self conciousnous...
shadows of the past connects and surrounds my body...
as my mind and soul mimics time, time itself has collapse and fell all at once...
this is the only sense of peace in hell...
as my heart bleeds of blood...
as my lungs gasp for air...
as my mind runs a million miles...
a crackling of the dead is herd...
breathing fumes of the dead...
is it to become the dead?
as the unrequitted loved ones hurry out of me...
they disperes into the air...
cloaking themselves into the atmotsphere...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

ignorance and decisions... are my enemy...
the mind plays a clever trick on me..
as my heart suffers the consequences...
deception is my happiness...
to see you smile as i suffer...
it makes me feels something...
as i hold my breath...
my heart squeezes...
the pain of it sinking...
the sense of it evapourating...
as i gasp for air... i relise that im still alive...
and your still there...

i loath you so much....
i love loathing you...
itll be nice for a change to finnally hate someone...
i need to hate someone....
this torture is bliss...
a crazy delusional mind is what stands before you...
as you tell me you accept me for who i am...
its almost laughable because...its the deception that i have betowed apon you...
it's what you loath and love...
it's what you lingre for...

the scars of life...
a open book that has been torn...
the cover stabed with a knife....
the back cover sliced...
pages that were filled with black and white words..
and colorful pictures that have been riped and torn apart and thrown in to the fire...
there are no words to read...
the author has nothing to say inside...
will you like me to buy a new book?
change? why do you want me to change?
shall i just place a new cover over the old one?
aint i doing that already?
shall i place another?
im tired...
you make me tired...
i just want to lay there sleeping...
hearing the pit pattter of a cold sunday morning...
with the dark and gloomy clouds....
shining apon me...
let me suffer more...
i deserve more of it..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
everyday i feel as i watch ppl in this glass box...
every breath i take it fogs up....
i can barely see or maybe i like it this way...
all i see now is one spot...
it is where im heading....
it looks like a good place to walk forward too...
to be where you are is what i now only see...
i shall give all of me to you...
for where you are is not where they are...
they are no longer with us...
then...i have nothign else but you....
cause i have no one but you..
no one but you to talk with...
no one but you to breath with...
no one but you to sleep with..
no one but you to live with...
no one but you...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
a moment traped in time,
a gateway to the malevolence of man kind...
yet a window to beauty...
hundereds, thousands gather to witness...
all to take part of history...
a flock of seagulls...
devouring the very essence of human kind..
looking from a distance it is but clear...
to whom ever lay their eyes on it...
yet there is a flaw...
that cant be seen by the naked eye...
standing closer... viewing each brush stroke..
viewing each dab of paint...
veiwing proportion of the painting...
the painting emmits a stench...
a stench that mankind leaves behind...
the painting drools of pain and sufferring...
it would apear that it was created by blood and sweat...
and the skin of the paiting has humanprints...
nails, hair, and other human belongings have been carefully camouflaged...
and yet...as you step further and further away...
it once again returns to its gateway to human kind...
so a fence has been forever placed..
to not witness the true meaning of human kind..
and to be decieved by its bliss...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

a choir, a symphony of sound...
like the ocean...the wave of sound rushes thru my ear...
as i close my eyes, it is as if ive turned my back from this wave of sound...
clashes and collides with my spine/back...
rushes up towards my neck....
a sense of peace as i feel as if im in flight..
soaring across the sky...
and the wave of sounds beneath me...
opening my eyes just shows me where im actually...
an irritation of wanting to return and fly...
as the sounds soon turn repeatitive....
the sounds soon turn to noises...
noises that hinder annoyance...
annoyance become a migrain...
the sound will forever haunt my head...
it echos in the walls of my skull...
crying wont do any good...
i close my eyes again...
and im in flight once more...
but im in darkness...
i see nothing...
i dont think i want to open my eyes to see the light again....

Compare the best of their days
With the worst of your days:
You won't win
With your standards so high
And your spirits so low.
At least remember,
This is you on a bad day, you on a pale day.
Just do your best and don't,
Don't worry, oh,
The way you hang yourself is, oh, so unfair

the cold breeze of the morning...
freeze my face and toes...
as i tuck it in the warm snug temperature between the sheets..
i relise that this feeling is transcendent...
and soon enough somethign comes to disrupt it...
the urge to go to release yesterdays residue...
the urge is but a prik on the finger...
as you continue to outstand it..
and try to treasue what you have..
the pain slowly increases and you relise that...
you cannot withstand it any longer..
you dont want to get up..
your afraid what you will loose...
but your afraid what you must do...
will be done where you are sleeping so gracefully...
so you quickly hurry to release it all..
and return...to bed.. and its gone...
you can feel the essence...the remains of what once was there..
you feel what you once feel again everyday...
you stupidly try to retain what was once lost..
as you lay there to return this warmth...
as it slowly returns..
what you felt is different..
somewhat...anomalous..
and it soon heats up...
the warmth is too hot..
its irratating..annoying....
and you kick the blankets away...
you cant stand the heat...
and accept that you cant attain it again...
not untill you sleep again..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
in a dark room filled with people...
blinded, looking forward, upwards, backward, sideward....
seeying no further then thier hands...
hearing, screams of children...
smelling the musk of men....
touching the soft silk of women....
as a spot light shuns down in the centre of the room...
a man stands before them...
this man shows why he belongs in this light...
perform incredible strength...
another light appears and a woman appears...
this woman shows why she belongs in this light...
performing magnificiant acrobatic skills...
the crowd eagerly wants to show why they should be under the light...
stumbbling to the centre...there is a glass wall...
an announcement is soon herd...that this is the
circus spectacular...
the room starts to fill up with light...
a big man....high up in the room...
looks down apon them...
at a snap of a whip...animals appear before him...
kneeling, jumping, growling, it goes on and on...
soon enuff clowns come rushing in...
they dont have a light shun apon them...
they are fighting to be within the spotlight...
they are in the background...
crying, laughing.....
one clown tries to perform an acrobatic trick and falls over...
the other clown tries to lift the same amount of weight as the man did...and falls over...
one clown tries to get high up to the tent...to reach to the whip....and falls over...
some of the crowd laughs at their effort...
some of the crowd are amazed at their efforts..
some of the crowd dont even care...
the crowd is astonished and tries its best to crack this glass wall...
some try to climb it..
some try to find a door...
some try to dig deep into the ground...
some give up...and leave the tent...
soon the show ends...
and they once again are within darkness...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
the edge of a cliff...
the wind luring you, pushing you to jump...
you lean as curiosity of the unknown off in to the distance...
a gust of wind, and you loose your balance and fall off the cliff...
as you soon accept your fate...
death embraces you...
a celebration as your hair dances in the air...
maybe you should keep your eyes open...
maybe you should close it...
sigh...again with the maybes...
even when faced with death comes with decisions..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

a flicker of spark lights up my night...
a gouged flame burn the very essense of evil...
as a minion follows and breaths in the intoxic fumes...
left in extasy, as my lungs deterieorate...
having full acknowledgment of the harms and affect it can cause...
i once again breath in, addicted to the fumes...
i closes my eyes and tilts my head back and loses my self conciousnous...
shadows of the past connects and surrounds my body...
as my mind and soul mimics time, time itself has collapse and fell all at once...
this is the only sense of peace in hell...
as my heart bleeds of blood...
as my lungs gasp for air...
as my mind runs a million miles...
a crackling of the dead is herd...
breathing fumes of the dead...
is it to become the dead?
as the unrequitted loved ones hurry out of me...
they disperes into the air...
cloaking themselves into the atmotsphere...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

ignorance and decisions... are my enemy...
the mind plays a clever trick on me..
as my heart suffers the consequences...
deception is my happiness...
to see you smile as i suffer...
it makes me feels something...
as i hold my breath...
my heart squeezes...
the pain of it sinking...
the sense of it evapourating...
as i gasp for air... i relise that im still alive...
and your still there...

i loath you so much....
i love loathing you...
itll be nice for a change to finnally hate someone...
i need to hate someone....
this torture is bliss...
a crazy delusional mind is what stands before you...
as you tell me you accept me for who i am...
its almost laughable because...its the deception that i have betowed apon you...
it's what you loath and love...
it's what you lingre for...

the scars of life...
a open book that has been torn...
the cover stabed with a knife....
the back cover sliced...
pages that were filled with black and white words..
and colorful pictures that have been riped and torn apart and thrown in to the fire...
there are no words to read...
the author has nothing to say inside...
will you like me to buy a new book?
change? why do you want me to change?
shall i just place a new cover over the old one?
aint i doing that already?
shall i place another?
im tired...
you make me tired...
i just want to lay there sleeping...
hearing the pit pattter of a cold sunday morning...
with the dark and gloomy clouds....
shining apon me...
let me suffer more...
i deserve more of it..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
everyday i feel as i watch ppl in this glass box...
every breath i take it fogs up....
i can barely see or maybe i like it this way...
all i see now is one spot...
it is where im heading....
it looks like a good place to walk forward too...
to be where you are is what i now only see...
i shall give all of me to you...
for where you are is not where they are...
they are no longer with us...
then...i have nothign else but you....
cause i have no one but you..
no one but you to talk with...
no one but you to breath with...
no one but you to sleep with..
no one but you to live with...
no one but you...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
a moment traped in time,
a gateway to the malevolence of man kind...
yet a window to beauty...
hundereds, thousands gather to witness...
all to take part of history...
a flock of seagulls...
devouring the very essence of human kind..
looking from a distance it is but clear...
to whom ever lay their eyes on it...
yet there is a flaw...
that cant be seen by the naked eye...
standing closer... viewing each brush stroke..
viewing each dab of paint...
veiwing proportion of the painting...
the painting emmits a stench...
a stench that mankind leaves behind...
the painting drools of pain and sufferring...
it would apear that it was created by blood and sweat...
and the skin of the paiting has humanprints...
nails, hair, and other human belongings have been carefully camouflaged...
and yet...as you step further and further away...
it once again returns to its gateway to human kind...
so a fence has been forever placed..
to not witness the true meaning of human kind..
and to be decieved by its bliss...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

a choir, a symphony of sound...
like the ocean...the wave of sound rushes thru my ear...
as i close my eyes, it is as if ive turned my back from this wave of sound...
clashes and collides with my spine/back...
rushes up towards my neck....
a sense of peace as i feel as if im in flight..
soaring across the sky...
and the wave of sounds beneath me...
opening my eyes just shows me where im actually...
an irritation of wanting to return and fly...
as the sounds soon turn repeatitive....
the sounds soon turn to noises...
noises that hinder annoyance...
annoyance become a migrain...
the sound will forever haunt my head...
it echos in the walls of my skull...
crying wont do any good...
i close my eyes again...
and im in flight once more...
but im in darkness...
i see nothing...
i dont think i want to open my eyes to see the light again....

as we are ready to part our ways...
i take a long good stare at you...
as i close my eyes...
a burnt image of you is imbeded...
a bright light coats around you...
darkness slowly eating away at the light...
every breath...every second...
the light begins to fade...
soon all i see is darkness...
maybe i should reopen my eyes..
maybe i should go to sleep...
i am just a blind man in life without you...

maybe i knew it will make me feel this way....
maybe im devious and planned it to be this way..
maybe i want to be this way to just feel...
maybe i love to be the victim...
maybe i loath ppl and want them to feel guilty of living...
maybe i wish i didn't think too much maybe i didn't think of you too much...
maybe...jsut maybe...
maybe you shouldn't think too much of me..
maybe you shouldn't expect too much of me..
maybe all i can give you is what you see...
maybe ive accepted i can never be that again...
maybe i never was that...
maybe im being unfair maybe your getting confused..
maybe i should stop being vague..
maybe its my friend and my downfall..
maybe im repeating myself.. maybe thats all i have left to say to you..
maybe thats all i got to say to you..
maybe your bored.. maybe your concerned....
maybe you are there.. maybe your not..
maybe you are getting irritated by the word maybe..
maybe maybe baby..
maybe i should go..
maybe i shoud leave...
maybe its your fault..
maybe its mine..
maybe i should change..
maybe i cant...
maybe i should stop..
maybe i will..